Cyber Rainbow: Obama’s Promised Job Programs and Plans

Obama Can’t But I Can

Barack Hussein Obama has already spent $4 trillion and if you still don’t have a job then Obama can’t help you. But I can. And it won’t cost you half a trillion bucks either.

Almost anyone who really wants to work and who is willing to do whatever it takes to get legitimate work should be able to find a job and here’s how:

1) Network

Tell everyone you have ever known that you are looking for a job and would appreciate a referral. Tell everyone you have ever known that you would appreciate it if they could let you know if even a rumor of a job comes up.

Talk to friends, lovers and coworkers. Talk to friends of friends. Talk to preachers, pastors and lawyers. Talk to distant relatives—the more distant the better. Talk to old school chums you have talked to in years.

There’s a game called the Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon. There are various variants of the game. In one variant you try to link Kevin Bacon to every movie star in Hollywood.

Just like that game, someone in your extended network is indeed sitting around waiting to give you a job—but they don’t know it. You’d have to ask them first. That’s what networking can do for you. Tell the people you talk to tell everyone they talk to that you are looking for work.

2) Train

In the long run, you may need some long term training in a community college or in a technical or vocational school. In the short run, you need to earn money for food, gas, and the bills that are coming due soon. So either a short term training program or a program that pays you to train is in order.

A) Look for any existing city, country, state, or federal job training. This includes military enlistment. If a training program exists, including signing up for the military, join the program and let the government pay for your training. One of the beauties of this is that the government has already paid for this. No new spending is required. It is your right, and if you are unemployed, your duty to take advantage of this.

B) Get a job that will train you. Go on the internet and use a Meta job search engine like www.Indeed.com to search for terms like “trainee” or “entry level”. By the way, a Meta search engine takes jobs from all the smaller job search engines and puts them all in one place.

At this stage, don’t worry about what the entry level job is. No one you will be competing with knows how to do the job either. Apply for all the jobs that come up in this category in your local area.

C) Train yourself

This process is more viable than you might think. Go down to your local library and visit your local government unemployment or job training center. Look to see if any of the computers they have available for your use have programs like Microsoft Word, Excel or PowerPoint. If you are more adventurous, the look for Adobe photoshop or any of the Adobe products.

If you find some useful software on the computers you have access to, look for tutorials that are bundled with the software. Often the help menu or the F1 button can aid you with your search.

Go through every tutorial and exercise the machine has available. Go on internet and find more tutorials and go through them.

After you have done this, create a resume and claim your new knowledge as a skill on your resume. Now place your resume with every internet job search engine you can think of. Some to try are Monster, Careerbuilder, Dice, Indeed, JuJu,and SimplyHired. Be sure to associate a current phone number with your resume so you can easily be reached.

A smart job applicant would be particularly assiduous at finding the tutorials that are really, really difficult. Tutorials that are a real pain to understand and to master would be best. Get really, really good at the hard stuff, by repetition and finding many examples that approach the difficult problems from different angles. Employers will have to hire you because you can do something none of their current employees can do and you can do it with ease. This does not require that you be better than anyone else. Rather it only requires that you be more determined and more patient and less willing to quit.

Another way to get access to these computer programs is to look for a community college that offers courses on using these programs. You will want a college that has a large bank of computers for students to do course work. There is nothing stopping you from using every spare hour you have studying whatever program you care to on the school’s computers. You don’t have to proceed at the pace of the class; you can go at your own pace.

D) While we are on the subject, get training through community colleges or vocational schools. This kind of training takes longer but in the end can be more valuable. If cost is an issue, stick with the cheaper, public institutions like community colleges.

Also look to see if they scholarships, grants, loans or stipends. Spend some time at the library looking for college money. There are books that list grants and scholarships for people with a certain last name or ethnicity or who are the son or daughter of a military man. Google this information or ask the librarian for help on find the scholarship books.

If you choose to attend a vocational school, make sure the school is licensed and accredited to operate in your state. You generally safer going to a trade school that has operated for a longer period of time.

3) Jump.

Pull the ripcord.

Let’s suppose that you are running through various job strategies and nothing seems to be working or you are running out of time, money or someone else’s patience. Then it’s time to go job search commando. The go-to stand by jobs in virtually every state in the union are sales and management. These jobs exist almost everywhere. Often they require little or no training. Some of the jobs that do require training will pay you while you train.

Borrow a suit. Paint a smile on your face and show up to any office that advertises that they need salesmen or manager trainees and apply for the gig.

Use any job search engine you like to look for these jobs. Monster will do nicely. Be sure to create and save a resume at the job search site. Search for sales, or salesman, or manage, or manager. Join up these searches with filters like entry level or trainee if you have never done these jobs before.

If you have been out of work for a long time, these kinds of jobs are the real test of whether or not you really want a job. In some places they have such high turnover rates that they will take anyone. Even you. The best time to get such a job is right before and during the holidays. After Halloween, you need to keep knocking on doors until you get someone to answer. You will almost certainly get a job for the holidays—if you really want one.

Speaking of seasonal jobs around the holidays, although they are not necessarily sales or management, be sure to apply to all the package shipping places for work like FedEx and UPS.

Look for help wanted placards in the windows of stores or gas stations. They want you. Help them to know that by applying for the job.

4) Job Search Strategy

I suggest you use one of the Meta job search engines like www.indeed.com. This can be quicker and easier than dealing with a myriad of job search engines like Dice, Careerbuilder and Monster. Basically Indeed will search all those sites and a lot of job search sites you have never heard of and then deliver the results to you in one place at one time. Use the Advance Job search filters to set things like the distance from your house or the kinds of jobs you want to see or the kinds of jobs you don’t want to see. If you have any skills be sure to set the filter to look for them. Try to limit your job search to jobs that came available in the past 7 days and jobs that are less than 25 miles from you. You can always widen your search if you are not seeing what you want.

If you want to target a specific field in your job search such as IT, then it might be best to pick a job search engine that is best suited for it. For IT for instance, DICE is a good way to go. Be sure to register with the site and save your resume their so employers can find you. Part of the registration process will involve filling out a profile so be sure to accomplish that as well. Freshen up your resume at least once per month whether you need to or not so prospective employers know that you are still in the game.

Another strategy is to schedule interviews with the leading head hunter agencies in your field such as Robert Half, Manpower, or Kelly. Again, rent a suit, paint on smile, and come to the interview with resumes and references in one hand and be ready to shake hands with the other. Take all the skill tests they want to give you. And if they have constructive advice on something you need to brush up on by all means do so and then take the tests again.

5) Move.

Everything else has failed. There are no jobs for you in your field where you live. Any of the training programs that would train you for the few jobs that actually exist in your area would either take longer to complete than the time you have allotted to your job search or you just don’t have the prerequisites for the training. You are too old for the military or you have physical or legal problems that make your undesirable for the military.

There is only one thing left. Move.

Do some research on the Internet. Find the cities, states and regions that have the jobs you want or the jobs in your field. Check out things like training in the area you are planning to move to then check the cost and availability of training where you are. It might be cost effective to train where you are and then move to the place where you work if there happens to be free or cheap training where you currently reside but not in the new place.

If you have to, borrow money from friends and relatives to get the money required to move. If you have truly hit rock bottom then sell blood plasma or whole blood and scavenge aluminum cans to get grub stake. Don’t forget to go to churches and charities and let them know you need to do odd jobs to generate a grub stake to get more permanent employment. Go down to the unemployment department and find out where the day labor worksites are if you have to. By the way, this is the temporary kind of thing many of us have done to get by for a little while until our ship comes in.

If you moved with very little cash you may be in for a rough landing when you get to where you are going. The same procedure of going to churches, charities and day labor outfits can be the way to go until you get your bearings.

It is better of course if you can borrow enough cash or have saved up enough money to pull up stakes, move and stay in the cheapest motel imaginable until you get that job that you moved for.

Don’t wait. Apply for the job you moved for the moment you hit town. Get a local phone number so it is easy for employers to contact you. A cheap disposable phone can help you there.

Moving is one of the best and most sure fire ways to get a new job if you can’t find one where you now live.

Another almost can’t miss method is to apply for sales or management trainee jobs.

Going for seasonal or holiday jobs works for almost everyone.

Getting a government job can be time consuming activity and their hiring process can take a long time. If you are qualified for the military, go see a recruiter and see if you can enlist and get trained in the field you are interested in on the government dime. Be sure to take all the educational benefits you are entitled to. That is what they are there for.

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